Saturday, August 07, 2004
Just finished catching up on friends' blogs. Its been such a long time since I've felt at leisure in front of my computer - my new job has no downtime and the hubby hogs the home machine with his newfound obsession with loading up the itunes with every bit of music in the house.
It is such an inspiration and an awesomely quieting experience to read the great great writing of these friends of mine. These astute, intelligent, insightful, emotionally connected and extremely well spoken friends who articulate so aptly the very reactions I'm having to current events. One thing that really resonated with me was the fear of getting one's hopes up - of getting carried away in the joy of a speech like Obama's. I become afraid - I want so much for things to change. How horrible if we continue down the road our country seems to be on. The wreckless abuse of our environment, the abandonment of diplomacy, the flippant dismissal of differing points of view within and outside our country. I really miss the America I have always so proud to be a part of. At the same time I don't want to live in fear or reflexively vilifying others or simplifying this struggle down to "those other idiots versus my side." This emboldens me to again put aside the prominent worse case scenario aspect of my nature and allow myself to witness the excitement and potential of this time. And get carried away sometimes.
I sat down thinking I had nothing to say but time to say something...And something came out. A couple somethings.
It is a quiet Saturday, my relatively new friend who came over for mac and cheese has been gone for a couple of hours and I am now listening to our well populated itunes (ok thanks honey), petting the cat and just being still and quiet in my home. This feels like the first time in my life I've ever done this. Its not. I'm just the sort who if I'm not on the way to somewhere else or re-organizing the house, I think I should be. Unless its after 11pm in which case I'm abusing the television and in a semi-comatose and highly suggestible state.
Sit, read, think, watch the sun beam in through the windows sweet and low for the 3 minutes in the day when it is especially beautiful like that. Am I now in the moment? In the now? Ok, I think I like it. And thanks to my genius blogging friends I am again excited about the next several months and the great potential before us all right now.
Have a lovely Saturday night.
It is such an inspiration and an awesomely quieting experience to read the great great writing of these friends of mine. These astute, intelligent, insightful, emotionally connected and extremely well spoken friends who articulate so aptly the very reactions I'm having to current events. One thing that really resonated with me was the fear of getting one's hopes up - of getting carried away in the joy of a speech like Obama's. I become afraid - I want so much for things to change. How horrible if we continue down the road our country seems to be on. The wreckless abuse of our environment, the abandonment of diplomacy, the flippant dismissal of differing points of view within and outside our country. I really miss the America I have always so proud to be a part of. At the same time I don't want to live in fear or reflexively vilifying others or simplifying this struggle down to "those other idiots versus my side." This emboldens me to again put aside the prominent worse case scenario aspect of my nature and allow myself to witness the excitement and potential of this time. And get carried away sometimes.
I sat down thinking I had nothing to say but time to say something...And something came out. A couple somethings.
It is a quiet Saturday, my relatively new friend who came over for mac and cheese has been gone for a couple of hours and I am now listening to our well populated itunes (ok thanks honey), petting the cat and just being still and quiet in my home. This feels like the first time in my life I've ever done this. Its not. I'm just the sort who if I'm not on the way to somewhere else or re-organizing the house, I think I should be. Unless its after 11pm in which case I'm abusing the television and in a semi-comatose and highly suggestible state.
Sit, read, think, watch the sun beam in through the windows sweet and low for the 3 minutes in the day when it is especially beautiful like that. Am I now in the moment? In the now? Ok, I think I like it. And thanks to my genius blogging friends I am again excited about the next several months and the great potential before us all right now.
Have a lovely Saturday night.
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